Taglines From my Bulletin Board Days

This page has just lists of what used to be called TAGLINES.  When we got on the computer in the old days, 1980’s, we did it without pictures most of the time.  The internet wasn’t something that was easily got, and when you got it, you had to type a bunch of code to access it.  Even then there were no fancy graphics. Actually NO graphics that weren’t made out of numbers and letters, which is a whole nunther subject, like smileys.

But we did have BULLETIN BOARDS.  The modern equivalent of that is called a Dicussion Group.  Chat wasn’t called chat, but you could directly chat through your keyboard to the Systems Operator, (and he could see what you typed too), who owned the computer that ran the bulletin board. Heck he might be right across town, or several towns over.

You signed up with one or several of these places that you could dial into, which were normally local so that long distance charges didn’t make you poor.  They always had great titles and names.  Then, choosing a category, or group, or subject, you discussed that subject with other people.  You could use your own name or not, depending on your level of comfort.  And the discussions were hot and heavy.

There was what was called a Moderator, who was kind of a referee so that people didn’t get too hateful.  But there were even categories that were used exclusively for ranting and raving and being hateful too.  Flaming, as it was called, was frowned upon for the most part in most groups though.  They still have Moderators, but somehow it wasn’t the same.

Now when you left each message, you could put what was called a TAGLINE at the end of it.  Normally these were cute sayings (as they are now), or heavy thoughts or maybe an advertisement.  Philosophy was popular, and so were things that people said in movies and tv, such as Star Trek, The Borg, etc . . .

I kept all of those taglines that I saved.  (Probably others did too)  So here I am re posting them.  Be sure not to think that they might resemble my belief system.  Some do and some don’t.  I’d hate to start a ancient flame war.  There were thousands, and I do have thousands, but they weren’t ALL good.

Feel free to copy these and take them with you.  Taglines are for sharing.  They always were.


Dime: a dollar with all the taxes taken out

Don’t be sexist.  Broads hate that

Don’t drive yourself crazy…let me do it for you…

Don’t hate yourself in the morning – sleep till noon

Don’t worry, I’m fluent in weirdo

My other computer is an F-14’s targeting system

Drop your carrier…We have you surrounded!

Enough research will tend to support any theory!

Ensign Pilsbury? He’s Bread, Jim.  (star trek)

ERROR! Windows found! Formatting Drive C:!

Everyone is entitled to my opinion

Excess is never enough

Experiencing tagline difficulties, Please Stand By

Facts are stubborn things

Famous Last Words: “I disarmed the trap.”

Fat heads, lean brains

Feet smell, nose runs?  You’re built upside down

Fiction: It can’t hold a scandal to biography

First Shalt thou pull out the Holy Pin!

From a mind… far far away . . .

Fund (give cash) amentalism (without brains)

Gastrointestinal Distress by A. Moeba

Go speed racer. Go speed racer

Handwritten on a condom machine; “This gum tastes funny.”


He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals

Help!  I’m a prisoner in a tagline factory!

Here I run, to steal the secret of the Sun

HOLY BATSHIT, FATMAN!  I mean…” – Robin

Home Safety Tip #1. Don’t iron whilst naked

Veni Vidi Wiwi

“Cry ‘Shamrock,’ and let’s sip the grog of yore

How do you know when you’ve run out of invisible ink?

How to hack a Computer:  Step 1: Take axe and…

I am a Baudaholic

I am not an animal!  I am … well not an animal.

I can resist everything except temptation

I do not pretend to know what the ignorant are sure of

I don’t know what apathy means, nor do I care …

I finally got it all together buy forgot where I put it

I remember when we upgraded from 60 baud modems to 75 baud

I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul

I want to live with a synonym girl…

I will NOT reply to this topic … I will NOT reply to…

I wish Noah had swatted those two flies…

I wish to register a complaint!

I wonder why you park in a driveway and drive on parkway?

I’d give my left arm to be ambidextrous

I’ll dangle my participle anywhere I want to!

I’m in my own little world but everybody knows me there

I’m in shape … round’s a shape isn’t it?

I’m more humble than you are!

I’ve been seduced by the Chocolate Side of the Force

If I were here more often I wouldn’t be gone so much

If it tastes good, it’s trying to kill you

If people listened to themselves they would shut up

If there were no golf balls how would we measure hail?

If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three

If you can’t bite, don’t show your teeth

Incorrigible punster — do not incorrige!

Is this a Kodak moment or a Maalox moment?

It is a prehistoric practice to put “y” everywhere

It is bad luck to be superstitious

It is double pleasure to deceive the deceiver

It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose

It works better if you plug it in *AND THEN* turn it on

It’s a poor sort of memory that only works backwards

It’s Admiral Hungry!”  “He’s FED, Jim!  (Star Trek)

It’s Ensign dog…. He’s shed

It’s Ensign Pillsbury … he’s BREAD

It’s Ensign Zeppelin..He’s LED

It’s not over until the FAT table sings

It’s okay to call someone stupid; just don’t prove it

It’s only a hobby … only a hobby … only a hobby…

Aunt Em: Hate Kansas.  Hate you.  Took dog  -Dorothy

Darned Unitarians burned a question mark on my lawn!

i haVE A bBS cALleD aMoEBA’s pROtAZOa bAR AND i nEEd TaG LinES AbOUt AmOEbA’s!

The race is over. The rats won

Let’s see your tagline hunting permit

Life is lived forwards but understood backwards

May we kiss those we please and please those we kiss

My opinion is uncluttered by facts!

Never argue with a woman when she’s tired … or rested

Never invest in anything that eats or needs painting

Never let a computer know you’re in a hurry

Never sharpen your boomerang

Never squat with your spurs on

Next time you wave use all your fingers

No generalization is wholly true, not even this one

No matter where you go, there you are


No one can think clearly with clenched fists

No sense being pessimistic.  It wouldn’t work anyway.

Not everything more difficult is more meritorious

Notice: All incoming fire has the right of way

Now bring us……..A SHRUBERRY!

Now go aweh or Ah shall taunt yeu a second tahm-e!

Oh I’m a lumberjack and I’m okay…….


Okay, If you’re so smart. Set your VCR clock!

Old age is better than the alternative

Please don’t yell at me.  I’m new at this

Put on your seatbelt. I’m gonna try something new



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